Saturday, April 13, 2019

We Know Nothing...Really, Nothing At All

'I'm glad you asked that question. Let me be perfectly 'clear', and not the least 'ambiguous' with my 'honest government' answer, and you can be 'assured' that you can believe everything I say, which even I, myself, believe is mostly true.
You see, when my boss 'said' those words about Wikileaks, he did not bring those words from his heart of hearts. In fact, it did not even come from his brain! Those meaningless words actually, and simply, came from his 'lips'. Even I, have no clue as to what Wikileaks, or whatever it's called, is. No clue. Really. But then, I have no clue about most things anyway. I just sit around waiting for jesus to tell me stuff to say. Anyway, you may have noticed that a lot of meaningless words come from my bosses meaningless 'lips'. Please do not put a lot of stock in what he says. I sure don't, and you shouldn't either. If you hum real loud to yourself it's easy to block out most of what spills out of his lips. That's what I do, and let me tell you, it works wonders! I just clasp my hands under my little Vice Presidential chinny-chin-chin, click my heels, spin around in my closet, and praise my invisible lord that someday soon, I'll be Evangelical President Extraordinaire! Praise the lord, and pass the offering plate! I'm sure I've cleared this question up to everyone's 'satisfaction', but then, that's my job around here as the White House Chaplin, or whatever my job is. Whatever. Really.'
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Asked about Trump's lie that he knows nothing about Wikileaks, Vice…

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