'What a crowd! Will ya look at that! Huge crowd, bigly numbers! No President has ever had such a turnout like this! I'd like to thank your schools for letting you out early today so that you could come and prostrate yourselves before me. What an 'honor' it must be for you. I didn't even know we had this many Boy Scouts in all of America! Big numbers! And all this, just for 'me'. I'm glad to see that you don't allow 'girls' to join your club! Imagine That! Whoa! Bad idea! I want to give a huge shout-out to all the parents who brought your children here especially to see me, and hear my words of 'encouragement', I know they all feel honored to be in my 'king like' presence, and will remember this moment for the rest of their lives. Before I forget, and move on to politics, I'd like to thank "the moms and dads" for upholding “the sacred values of our nation.” Boy, I wish 'I' could do that! Oh, and before I forget, be sure to convert to 'Republicanism' before the next election. Between you and my flaming evangelicals, I'll be a shoo-in for sure.
Have I mentioned that crooked Hillary yet? Yeah, I'm gonna fire that sorry traitor Jeff Sessions pretty soon. Disgusting! He should be investigating the Clintons instead of picking on me, your favorite, and esteemed President. I've done nothing wrong, unless cavorting with our enemies is all of a sudden a crime. And look how these deluded Demon-crats are picking on my children who are barely older than you, yourselves. Shameful! Innocent children. Remember, Scouts of America, the Demon-crats are our enemy, your enemy, America's enemy, your parents enemy! We must stop tem from destroying America, which by the way just happens to be My job. You can all help defeat our 'enemy' by joining and being faithful narrow minded members of my own favorite 'man-club', the 'NRA'. The NRA is simply a fun loving, gun toten, family oriented 'boys' club that's protecting America by ensuring that every boy in America can get his hands on a sexy gun. Make sure your parents join you up right away.
How about a great big 'Boo' for that disgusting Obama! What a mess he left for me to clean up! Did you know he was never a Boy Scout? Terrible!
Did I mention 'your' Other enemy, the "Fake News' media that's also trying to destroy your America? I just this morning saw on Fox news that the "Fake News" media is trying to shut down all of the Scout campgrounds! Are you gonna allow this!? And they want to take away your rights to build campfires! And you can say goodbye to those 'Merit Badges'! Horrible 'news'! My staff will be handing out torches and lynching ropes later.
Hey, how about Washington DC, your Capital! Did you know that since I took over it has turned into a "sewer" system? Used to be a "swamp", now it's a "sewer"! Disgusting place. Don't be alarmed though, I'm gonna get rid of the "sewer" rats, and install my Own 'monsters'.
Speaking of "Fake News", did you see where "The Amazon Washington Post fabricated the facts on my ending massive, dangerous, and wasteful payments to Syrian rebels fighting Assad"? More disgusting "Fake News"! Remember boys, don't believe Anything you read anymore. It's all "Fake News" trying to destroy your 'club'. The media is your enemy! They hate me, your protector. And if they hate Me, they hate you, and your parents, and your club leaders, as well. Remember, I am the Only person you can believe in, and trust. Remember, Me, me, me!
Well, I gotta go now, it's hot out here, and I hope I have fanned the flames of 'trust' in me, and don't trust 'them' in your, up to this point, innocent heads.
Remember, run right out and convert to 'Republicanism'.
Thanks again to your school teachers for letting you out early today so that you could come and be humbled, and honored in my rightious presence. What a crowd! Millions! Hillary, see that!? Millions! Bigly number! Future voters! They love me! Just listen to that applause from those little hands! Clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, will it never end? Is that a tear in my eye? Your praise is well directed. Go now spread my words far and wide.
Ok, Kellyann, get me outta here, these brats are smelly and their little sweaty hands smacking together is killing me! They can't even vote! They don't even golf! Disgusting! What? My mic was still on.???..what.?..what do you mean it was still On!? Damn demon-crats!'
Have I mentioned that crooked Hillary yet? Yeah, I'm gonna fire that sorry traitor Jeff Sessions pretty soon. Disgusting! He should be investigating the Clintons instead of picking on me, your favorite, and esteemed President. I've done nothing wrong, unless cavorting with our enemies is all of a sudden a crime. And look how these deluded Demon-crats are picking on my children who are barely older than you, yourselves. Shameful! Innocent children. Remember, Scouts of America, the Demon-crats are our enemy, your enemy, America's enemy, your parents enemy! We must stop tem from destroying America, which by the way just happens to be My job. You can all help defeat our 'enemy' by joining and being faithful narrow minded members of my own favorite 'man-club', the 'NRA'. The NRA is simply a fun loving, gun toten, family oriented 'boys' club that's protecting America by ensuring that every boy in America can get his hands on a sexy gun. Make sure your parents join you up right away.
How about a great big 'Boo' for that disgusting Obama! What a mess he left for me to clean up! Did you know he was never a Boy Scout? Terrible!
Did I mention 'your' Other enemy, the "Fake News' media that's also trying to destroy your America? I just this morning saw on Fox news that the "Fake News" media is trying to shut down all of the Scout campgrounds! Are you gonna allow this!? And they want to take away your rights to build campfires! And you can say goodbye to those 'Merit Badges'! Horrible 'news'! My staff will be handing out torches and lynching ropes later.
Hey, how about Washington DC, your Capital! Did you know that since I took over it has turned into a "sewer" system? Used to be a "swamp", now it's a "sewer"! Disgusting place. Don't be alarmed though, I'm gonna get rid of the "sewer" rats, and install my Own 'monsters'.
Speaking of "Fake News", did you see where "The Amazon Washington Post fabricated the facts on my ending massive, dangerous, and wasteful payments to Syrian rebels fighting Assad"? More disgusting "Fake News"! Remember boys, don't believe Anything you read anymore. It's all "Fake News" trying to destroy your 'club'. The media is your enemy! They hate me, your protector. And if they hate Me, they hate you, and your parents, and your club leaders, as well. Remember, I am the Only person you can believe in, and trust. Remember, Me, me, me!
Well, I gotta go now, it's hot out here, and I hope I have fanned the flames of 'trust' in me, and don't trust 'them' in your, up to this point, innocent heads.
Remember, run right out and convert to 'Republicanism'.
Thanks again to your school teachers for letting you out early today so that you could come and be humbled, and honored in my rightious presence. What a crowd! Millions! Hillary, see that!? Millions! Bigly number! Future voters! They love me! Just listen to that applause from those little hands! Clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, will it never end? Is that a tear in my eye? Your praise is well directed. Go now spread my words far and wide.
Ok, Kellyann, get me outta here, these brats are smelly and their little sweaty hands smacking together is killing me! They can't even vote! They don't even golf! Disgusting! What? My mic was still on.???..what.?..what do you mean it was still On!? Damn demon-crats!'
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