'....and so, in the 'strongest terms' I told my new, again, BFF Vlad, to knock it off with the hacking of our Democratic Institution already...well, actually, what I 'said' was, 'Geewhiz buddy ol' pal of mine, please, please, please, oh please wont you please stop hacking into our computers and stuff, please, please. If you'll stop I'll be your best ever bunkmate, I'll even learn to ride horses, and bare my manly chest just like you do. How about If I share some really secret... stuff with you, you know, about how to make lots of money and not have to pay taxes on it, and you can show me how to be a better dictator. My numbers are huge, really big. Hey, I like your Tie, is that one of 'mine'? Ya wanna be my really good friend? We can do lots of cool stuff together. We should "move forward" together. Do you like me? I like you. This is lots of fun. Who does your nails? Most of my hair is 'real'. Hey, I know what! Let's you and me form "a cyber security unit to protect against the kinds of illegal intrusions that U.S. intelligence agencies say" that you "ordered in the United States". Really Vlad, I don't know where in the world my 'Intelligence' buffs dug up that "fake news" about you doing that. Who can you 'trust' nowadays!? I 'know' you'd never do something like that because I 'know' you are a 'truthful' person, and always tell the 'truth' just like I 'always' do. That's why we're Presidents! What a bunch of liars the media is! And the "fake news" media in America! What's with that!? Don't worry Vlad, I'm busy turning the American public against the "fake news" media. Pretty soon they'll all be out of a job! Terrible! Disgusting trolls! I'll have my Own news stations with my Own 'reporters'. No more bad news about me. Never has a President been picked on like they do me! Liars!' 
See More
See More
The president also proposed a joint U.S.-Russia cybersecurity unit that was roundly panned by critics.
washingtonpost.com|By Philip Rucker
No comments:
Post a Comment