'Yeahhhh... my BFF- FWB Vlad, will be my "worst enemy" if our love affair "doesn't, not to be confused with the word 'does', work out". Oh, he'll be so sorry! I mean really, really, really sorry, of the worst kind. You think I have enemies Now! Ha! You ain't seen nothing yet! I can be such a mean friend when I have to be. Hey, I love the guy, he has all the 'qualities' that I, myself would love to have, but I'm way smarter than him. Great guy. Wonderful family guy. There's no one in Russia that doesn't, not to be confused with the word 'does', just love him to death. Everyone, as in republicans and my 'base', loves him as well. I wish I could make him an honorary citizen. Hmmm..must look in to that one. First I'd have to 'pardon' him of all his alleged, not to be confused with the word 'actual', sins.
His hand feels so small in my own. He tried to crush my hand but I got him first. Friends do that.
But really, I've thought of some cool punishment that I'll dole out to him if he ever breaks my cast iron heart. Like, no more bunk sharing for a whole week. No matter how much he cries I wont answer his texts for two days. He hates that. No more sniffing my manly arm pits while we're snuggling. I'll block him from my twitter page for a day or two. Those are just a few of the things I'll 'punish' him with. So, as you can see, I'm the 'alpha male' in our little 'secret' love affair. I let him think that he's in charge, but I play him like a cheap fiddle. He's so 'afraid' of me that he can't even look me in the eye, actually neither one of them. He's always looking with envy at my flaxen locks. So, my BFF-FWB had better be really nice to me, it's not a good idea to get on my bad side. As the whole world can now attest to.'
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His hand feels so small in my own. He tried to crush my hand but I got him first. Friends do that.
But really, I've thought of some cool punishment that I'll dole out to him if he ever breaks my cast iron heart. Like, no more bunk sharing for a whole week. No matter how much he cries I wont answer his texts for two days. He hates that. No more sniffing my manly arm pits while we're snuggling. I'll block him from my twitter page for a day or two. Those are just a few of the things I'll 'punish' him with. So, as you can see, I'm the 'alpha male' in our little 'secret' love affair. I let him think that he's in charge, but I play him like a cheap fiddle. He's so 'afraid' of me that he can't even look me in the eye, actually neither one of them. He's always looking with envy at my flaxen locks. So, my BFF-FWB had better be really nice to me, it's not a good idea to get on my bad side. As the whole world can now attest to.'
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