'Fee-fi-"Foe"-fum, hey look at me with my new FWB chum! Vlad is just the best friend ever! The whole world is now eating their disgusting hearts out because I'm his new pal, and they're not! Naaa, naa, na, naaa, naaaa! Am I one great 'negotiator' or what!? had him eating out of my huge manly hand! In the very first minute of holding Vlads sweaty little hand in my manly grip, I 'knew' that his soul belonged to me! He didn't stand a snowball's chance in hell! He wouldn't even look me straight in the eye! He gave Russia up in the first thirty seconds of my vice-like grip. What a pushover! I didn't let him get a word in edgewise. It was all about me, me, me! From now on I'll call the shots for the whole world, which by the way, is America's "foe". I'm the boss now. The whole world has finally witnessed just how 'strong' I am when it comes to dealing with other despots like myself. Did you see how he denied responsibility for breaking into America's electoral system, which as we all know helped get me elected? Great guy! I respect him to no end! Very 'trustworthy'! Hey, guess what? Vlad and I are gonna combine our top secret intellegence communities so that we can work 'together' to combat computor crimes all around the world. What an 'honorable' guy! I trust him more than I trust America's intellegence community! I believe everything he tells me. He has no reason to lie, does he?
Did you see how I shrewdly 'pretended' to agree with, and defend him while at the same time blaming everything on that disgusting Obama and America's intellegence community? I am so clever! Little did he know that I was only 'pretending' to be on his side. That makes me smarter than him. Don't you just hate illegal "witch hunts"? He does too! I'm gonna have a room reserved for him at my personal mansion, The White House. I think he'd like the Lincoln Room. They were so much alike! Two of a kind. While he's there we'll probably massage one another's 'egos'. But hey, that's just the way incompetent dictators work. He rubs my 'ego', I rub his. My friend, no "foe".'
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Did you see how I shrewdly 'pretended' to agree with, and defend him while at the same time blaming everything on that disgusting Obama and America's intellegence community? I am so clever! Little did he know that I was only 'pretending' to be on his side. That makes me smarter than him. Don't you just hate illegal "witch hunts"? He does too! I'm gonna have a room reserved for him at my personal mansion, The White House. I think he'd like the Lincoln Room. They were so much alike! Two of a kind. While he's there we'll probably massage one another's 'egos'. But hey, that's just the way incompetent dictators work. He rubs my 'ego', I rub his. My friend, no "foe".'
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