'Ring, ring, ring, rinnnnng...hello, you've reached the oval desk of king trump, (kt) how may I make you wealthy?
Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradar (mb): Your highness, this is your wanna-be BFF, official spokesperson for the world 'renowned' Taliban, you've probably heard of our esteemed little, people loving 'social movement' in the middle eastern countries.
kt: Ah, Mullah, how have you been my 'trust worthy' good friend? Long time no hear! What can you do for me today? What a pleasure it must be for you to hear my kingly voice.
Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradar (mb): Your highness, this is your wanna-be BFF, official spokesperson for the world 'renowned' Taliban, you've probably heard of our esteemed little, people loving 'social movement' in the middle eastern countries.
kt: Ah, Mullah, how have you been my 'trust worthy' good friend? Long time no hear! What can you do for me today? What a pleasure it must be for you to hear my kingly voice.
mb: Well, I just wanted to thank you for bailing out of Afghanistan and leaving the entire country to my 'social welfare' organization. Just wanted to assure you that from now on, and you can 'trust' my word on this, we will kill only those who Allah feels that should be slaughtered like the sheep they certainly are. In fact, even as we speak, our kind, and considerate 'community watch' patrols are busy bombing and slaughtering those who commit blasphemy, those who are homosexuals, those who love music, art, science, education of women, you know, infidels such as that. As you would agree, we cannot allow dissent among our captives and slaves. Again, from the bottom of my black as sin heart to yours likewise, thank you for turning your back on the Afghanistan people. You had us on the ropes for a while there but we knew that sooner or later you would turn tail and bail out for good. Praise be to Allah!
kt: Yeah, look Mullah, you seem like a nice enough guy, thanks for the call and I'm gonna tell everyone here what a great guy you are, and what a wonderful little, black heart to black heart chat we had, and how everything is just rosey there, and how the Afghan people just love your little 'boys club' to pieces, and how thankful they are that I was able to give them back their country, you know, stuff like that. So don't pay any attention to what flows from my lips after this call. Remember, it's just me selling 'snake oil' to my clueless subjects. They love that stuff! I have convinced them all that everything I say is the truth, and nothing but the truth so help their god. Look, pal of mine, gotta run, thanks for the heads-up. Maybe later you can visit my castle for a snack. My chef makes yummy pork chops!' :O
See Morekt: Yeah, look Mullah, you seem like a nice enough guy, thanks for the call and I'm gonna tell everyone here what a great guy you are, and what a wonderful little, black heart to black heart chat we had, and how everything is just rosey there, and how the Afghan people just love your little 'boys club' to pieces, and how thankful they are that I was able to give them back their country, you know, stuff like that. So don't pay any attention to what flows from my lips after this call. Remember, it's just me selling 'snake oil' to my clueless subjects. They love that stuff! I have convinced them all that everything I say is the truth, and nothing but the truth so help their god. Look, pal of mine, gotta run, thanks for the heads-up. Maybe later you can visit my castle for a snack. My chef makes yummy pork chops!' :O
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