"Alternative Facts" Poll

'Fellow Americans, especially all the tone deaf members of my 'Tum-Pet' fan club, I have astounding, incredible, totally 'Un-believable' 'news' to share with you this morning, a time when most Americans with any sense at all would be fast asleep and not worrying about 'popularity polls' as I, myself am prone to do. Fantastic 'news'! Wow! Wait 'til you hear it. Just wait. 'This' time I'm not even making this stuff up...like...I usually do. A 'well researched', and deeply 'scientific' 'poll' of at least three vapid Republicans shows beyond a 'reasonable' doubt that I, His Majesty Donald trump, is now more popular, and 'loved', by more Americans than that disgusting Obama what's his name. The poll 'reveals' that I am even more 'popular' than those city leaders in Cleveland that were indicted for providing poisonous Water to their constituents. The poll also showed that given a choice between stepping barefoot onto a large, rusty, cat feces encrusted construction nail, or having lunch with me in a 'Porta-John', most people would have lunch with me. Incredible! Huge numbers! Never seen before. I'm more popular than Jesus! I 'could' be the next 'Pope'. Do Catholics 'vote'? Gotta put that on my 'to do' list. Well, must go now. Must turn Fox 'news' on and see what's 'really' going on in the world. Always 'truthful' about me. 'Factual'. I wonder who won the Winter Olympics. Russia has some really great athletes. Wonderful people. Can't wait to buy another great 'poll' results. Who say's 'money can't buy happiness'? I'm the best! I'm the 'man'! Eat your sorry heart out Obama. By the way Obama, by the time I'm finished erasing your name, and memory from the history books, no one will even know you 'tried out' as President. Big fail! Loser! I'm the greatest. That's why I'm President, and you're not".' ;) ;)


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politicususa.com|By Jason Easley