Breaking 'News'! OMG! Breaking friggin' news already!
Hot off the press, brought to you by 'BBSN'(buddyblackssatiricalnews).
After stripping our national park service of billions of dollars of much needed funding which is now earmarked for building the 'wall', 'Trump The Benevolent', graciously, and with much pomp and ado, donated his first quarter Presidential salary of $78,333.32 to the National Parks Service. The money will go toward the purchase of two basic model pick ...up trucks which will be shared, on a rotation type schedule, among the 338 National Parks across the nation.
While 'Trump the Benevolent' was in this uncharacteristic giving , yet not 'forgiving' mood he fondly reminisced back to his wealthy 'class entitlement' days of un-tried youth, when claiming a mysterious medical condition that his clever personal Physician coined 'golf club feet', he was able to take full advantage of 'Military Deferment', thus escaping the dreaded rite of passage of becoming a 'Military guy'. So it was with one eye sufficiently teared up, and the other looking ahead to guaranteed self martyrdom that he donated fully half of his lifelong collection of One Hundred Thousand 'made in China' plastic Soldiers, all specially cast in his own military bearing, likeness, to the 'Military War College', under condition that when the 'soldiers' reach 'military age' they become official soldiers, thus completing his campaign pledge of "making our military stronger by doing more with less".
As for 'Trump The Benevolent's' heartwarming donation to the Parks Service, their bank refused payment on his check because it was printed on a huge piece of cardboard, as evidenced by the 'impromptu' Photo Op., too large in fact for the banks 'check cancellation' machine to process. Repeated calls to Trumps office by the Parks Service, and the bank itself, have gone unanswered, but for his answering service giving the message; 'Trump The Benevolent' is out of the office visiting his doctor in Palm Beach for treatment of his 'golf club foot' condition, please call again during business hours'.
;)
Hot off the press, brought to you by 'BBSN'(buddyblackssatiricalnews).
After stripping our national park service of billions of dollars of much needed funding which is now earmarked for building the 'wall', 'Trump The Benevolent', graciously, and with much pomp and ado, donated his first quarter Presidential salary of $78,333.32 to the National Parks Service. The money will go toward the purchase of two basic model pick ...up trucks which will be shared, on a rotation type schedule, among the 338 National Parks across the nation.
While 'Trump the Benevolent' was in this uncharacteristic giving , yet not 'forgiving' mood he fondly reminisced back to his wealthy 'class entitlement' days of un-tried youth, when claiming a mysterious medical condition that his clever personal Physician coined 'golf club feet', he was able to take full advantage of 'Military Deferment', thus escaping the dreaded rite of passage of becoming a 'Military guy'. So it was with one eye sufficiently teared up, and the other looking ahead to guaranteed self martyrdom that he donated fully half of his lifelong collection of One Hundred Thousand 'made in China' plastic Soldiers, all specially cast in his own military bearing, likeness, to the 'Military War College', under condition that when the 'soldiers' reach 'military age' they become official soldiers, thus completing his campaign pledge of "making our military stronger by doing more with less".
As for 'Trump The Benevolent's' heartwarming donation to the Parks Service, their bank refused payment on his check because it was printed on a huge piece of cardboard, as evidenced by the 'impromptu' Photo Op., too large in fact for the banks 'check cancellation' machine to process. Repeated calls to Trumps office by the Parks Service, and the bank itself, have gone unanswered, but for his answering service giving the message; 'Trump The Benevolent' is out of the office visiting his doctor in Palm Beach for treatment of his 'golf club foot' condition, please call again during business hours'.
;)
President Donald Trump is donating his first salary to the National Parks Service. His first quarter salary was $78,333
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