'Ladies and gentlemen of the Senate, thank you for coming on such short notice to this incredibly 'important' meeting. I awoke at my usual 'tweeting' time this morning and I looked over at my pal Stevie, and I said, 'Stevie, wake up man-bro, there's work to be done. Bigly. Now roll over here and fix my hair, and lets call for a really big meeting. Huge. Biggest ever, invite everyone!'
So, the first thing I'd like to talk about, but actually know very little about, so I won't,... is that pesky North Korea thing. Just who does that fat little dough-boy, what's his name, think he is?
The other thing I'd like to talk about is White House 'leaks'. So, if anyone needs to take a quick 'leak', the 'John' is down the hall, 2nd door on the right. Ladies, ya gotta share.
Another thing I'd like to 'clear up', is the 'air' in the White House. How about someone gearing up a committee to figure out why the 'air' is so foul since I 'moved' in. Terrible! Disgusting.
Oh, how about you guys up front here move back a few rows so that my Republican Press Corps can get up closer to take some 'candid' shots of me pretending that I know what I'm doing, and of course, you don't, and like myself, never will.
The most important thing I'd like to cover, besides my Russian loving arse, is that, did you know that I won the 'Electorial College' vote by a huge landslide? Hugely, bigly. Greatest numbers in history. Best money I ever spent! Did anyone bring do-nuts and coffee?
Ok, that about does it for today folks. Remember, I 'own' you, you are at my beck and call 24/7, so stay close to your phones. I'm sure you don't have any questions, and I'm sure that I have explained everything in detail, so get out of my sight, and continue to be good 'Trum-Pet puppetts'.
:/
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So, the first thing I'd like to talk about, but actually know very little about, so I won't,... is that pesky North Korea thing. Just who does that fat little dough-boy, what's his name, think he is?
The other thing I'd like to talk about is White House 'leaks'. So, if anyone needs to take a quick 'leak', the 'John' is down the hall, 2nd door on the right. Ladies, ya gotta share.
Another thing I'd like to 'clear up', is the 'air' in the White House. How about someone gearing up a committee to figure out why the 'air' is so foul since I 'moved' in. Terrible! Disgusting.
Oh, how about you guys up front here move back a few rows so that my Republican Press Corps can get up closer to take some 'candid' shots of me pretending that I know what I'm doing, and of course, you don't, and like myself, never will.
The most important thing I'd like to cover, besides my Russian loving arse, is that, did you know that I won the 'Electorial College' vote by a huge landslide? Hugely, bigly. Greatest numbers in history. Best money I ever spent! Did anyone bring do-nuts and coffee?
Ok, that about does it for today folks. Remember, I 'own' you, you are at my beck and call 24/7, so stay close to your phones. I'm sure you don't have any questions, and I'm sure that I have explained everything in detail, so get out of my sight, and continue to be good 'Trum-Pet puppetts'.
:/See More
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