'Ohhh Daddy, DaddyWar$Buck$, my heart is so bigly broken what with that mean ol' Russia stealing Crimea, please, oh pretty please, won't you run right out and just bomb the jeebies out of them!? And, before I totally forget, thank you ever so much for 'sorta' bombing that tiny little airplane place in...where was that at,...oh, yeah, Syria. How dare their President steal their 'gas' which they need for their motorized donkey carts! Shame on him! Disgusting. Terrible person. Such pretty bombs Daddy$Bucks! Great pilots. Wonderful families. You know Daddy, it's a good thing for America that you hired me to 'think' for you in times like this, otherwise you would be really lost. I know you were very busy that day lining up 'important' golf matches, and lunches with very rich, and powerful, but not as rich and powerful as yo are Daddy, but I really appreciate you 'caring' about the littlevthings that just break my heart into a million little pieces. Millions! Terrible little pieces. Hugely. You can be sure that from now on I will be your eyes and ears for what's going on in the world, and 'advise' you accordingly. That's what you hired me for, and boy am I already really good at it. I'm pretty 'sure' that there's some other places that will need the attention of your political 'savy', along with some well placed little 'reminder' 'bombs'. Oh DaddyWar$Buck$, there's So many things that make me 'heartbroken'. Sad. Tears. I promise, with your unbridled power, to save the whole heartbroken world, one little bomb at a time.' 
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