'The 'Chosen' One'
'Hello American 'sinners', God here. Hey, I'm not kidding this time! This is not a 'drill'. It's 'really' me! Geez! What's a guy gotta do around here to get noticed, walk on Water!?
Look people, I've been getting some disturbing 'tweets' from a good friend of mine, great guy, beautiful family, especially that one hot daughter of his, but hey, who's looking, right? Here's the t...hing, I'm not gonna mention his name, but his initials are, D O N A L D, holds a high position in government. Smart guy. Not smart as Me, but right up there. Actually, not a lot of common sense, but I still love the guy. Great hair-doo!
Holy cows! Jim Baker?? 'The' Jim Baker? I thought I sent him to sinners hell a long time ago! Hmmm...
Well, anyway, as I was saying, about those 'tweets' I've been getting. I don't have time, what with fighting the devil 24/7, to be distracted by this sort of blasphemy, and it seems like some sort of meltdown going on down here. I'll just set the holy record straight so there's no misunderstanding in the future. My friend, D O N A L D, is "the chosen one". When you 'diss' him you 'diss' me. You "come against the chosen one" and you come against me. Remember that old 'vengence is mine sayeth the Lord'? Well I have given Him the same 'power', and Unless you want a double whamey "curse" cast "upon you and your children and your children's children...like you have never seen", then you had best knock it off with bad mouthing, poking fun at, and ridiculing the 'chosen one'. The Taliban, and ISIS will look like boy scouts compared to the wrath of 'the chosen one', and Me. So just knock it off already! Oh, and stop calling him a 'big fat liar, liar'! He's not all that fat, he just has 'big bones'.'
;)
'Hello American 'sinners', God here. Hey, I'm not kidding this time! This is not a 'drill'. It's 'really' me! Geez! What's a guy gotta do around here to get noticed, walk on Water!?
Look people, I've been getting some disturbing 'tweets' from a good friend of mine, great guy, beautiful family, especially that one hot daughter of his, but hey, who's looking, right? Here's the t...hing, I'm not gonna mention his name, but his initials are, D O N A L D, holds a high position in government. Smart guy. Not smart as Me, but right up there. Actually, not a lot of common sense, but I still love the guy. Great hair-doo!
Holy cows! Jim Baker?? 'The' Jim Baker? I thought I sent him to sinners hell a long time ago! Hmmm...
Well, anyway, as I was saying, about those 'tweets' I've been getting. I don't have time, what with fighting the devil 24/7, to be distracted by this sort of blasphemy, and it seems like some sort of meltdown going on down here. I'll just set the holy record straight so there's no misunderstanding in the future. My friend, D O N A L D, is "the chosen one". When you 'diss' him you 'diss' me. You "come against the chosen one" and you come against me. Remember that old 'vengence is mine sayeth the Lord'? Well I have given Him the same 'power', and Unless you want a double whamey "curse" cast "upon you and your children and your children's children...like you have never seen", then you had best knock it off with bad mouthing, poking fun at, and ridiculing the 'chosen one'. The Taliban, and ISIS will look like boy scouts compared to the wrath of 'the chosen one', and Me. So just knock it off already! Oh, and stop calling him a 'big fat liar, liar'! He's not all that fat, he just has 'big bones'.'
;) 
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