'Oh thank you, thank you, thank you, for inviting me, the best evangelical Vice President ever to grace the halls of the White House, to give you the 'best' commencement speech ever.
I bring you joy, and good tidings from your 'humble', 'benevolent' President Trump, who could not be here today because he is busy giving away Billions and Billions of your US dollars to the leaders of Saudia Arabia, who as we all 'know' are starving to death, eating sand sandwiches just to make it through another pitiful day in that horrible desert they all live in. I'll be passing the 'plate' afterwards for donations that will go towards feeding their starving camels.
I just want to encourage you young folks to "become leaders" in the very image of President Trump. You will be wise to watch his every move, follow his every step, listen to everything he says, the way he says it, and who he says it to. You have so much to 'learn' from him! Copy his mannerisms, his propensity for telling the 'truth', never letting a 'lie' slip his tongue, always on 'guard' for those who would do harm to him and your country, and environment, his undying and relentless quest for the 'facts', no matter the case at hand. See how he 'manages' people around him, how he treats his employees, and those who 'he' can benefit from. Copy his facial expressions when under stress, the way he forms his words, and how he uses those 'wise' words in a sentence. Mimic his steadfast ways of 'honoring' those who deserve honor, and soundly defeating his enemies who would do him or America wrong. See how he 'avoids' people who would otherwise use his position to further their own agendas. Take from him his 'patience', his 'humbleness', his 'love' for minorities, and those less privileged than himself. Emulate his very being, his way of 'always' admitting the error of his ways, always 'facing' the truth, and being able to 'listen' to wiser words when necessary. In short, your President wants each and every one of you to go forth and mold yourselves in his very image, name your children after him, become him, be him. He is busy setting the 'best' example of a 'leader' that America has ever seen, or will ever have. Did I mention that he won by a bigly landslide of votes? Great guy. Love his family. So go on, and get out there, and be 'just like' your President! What could 'possibly' go wrong with that?'
I bring you joy, and good tidings from your 'humble', 'benevolent' President Trump, who could not be here today because he is busy giving away Billions and Billions of your US dollars to the leaders of Saudia Arabia, who as we all 'know' are starving to death, eating sand sandwiches just to make it through another pitiful day in that horrible desert they all live in. I'll be passing the 'plate' afterwards for donations that will go towards feeding their starving camels.
I just want to encourage you young folks to "become leaders" in the very image of President Trump. You will be wise to watch his every move, follow his every step, listen to everything he says, the way he says it, and who he says it to. You have so much to 'learn' from him! Copy his mannerisms, his propensity for telling the 'truth', never letting a 'lie' slip his tongue, always on 'guard' for those who would do harm to him and your country, and environment, his undying and relentless quest for the 'facts', no matter the case at hand. See how he 'manages' people around him, how he treats his employees, and those who 'he' can benefit from. Copy his facial expressions when under stress, the way he forms his words, and how he uses those 'wise' words in a sentence. Mimic his steadfast ways of 'honoring' those who deserve honor, and soundly defeating his enemies who would do him or America wrong. See how he 'avoids' people who would otherwise use his position to further their own agendas. Take from him his 'patience', his 'humbleness', his 'love' for minorities, and those less privileged than himself. Emulate his very being, his way of 'always' admitting the error of his ways, always 'facing' the truth, and being able to 'listen' to wiser words when necessary. In short, your President wants each and every one of you to go forth and mold yourselves in his very image, name your children after him, become him, be him. He is busy setting the 'best' example of a 'leader' that America has ever seen, or will ever have. Did I mention that he won by a bigly landslide of votes? Great guy. Love his family. So go on, and get out there, and be 'just like' your President! What could 'possibly' go wrong with that?'
Pence cites Trump's 'leadership' in commencement address
washingtonpost.com
No comments:
Post a Comment