NEWS ALERT!! NEWS ALERT!! NEWS ALERT!!!!!!
MASSIVE FIREBALL IN EASTERN SKY!
Just in from our 'News' Station BBSN;
Today, at approximately 7:05 am EST, a Huge FIREBALL was reported in the south eastern sky by startled residents of Atlantic City, New Jersey. All along the eastern seaboard 911 switchboards were inundated by frantic, and terrified callers! All traffic and commerce came to a standstill, airports quickly grounded all but emergency flights into and out of those facilities. The Military is on full alert! Our President has his mitts on the 'Red' phone! Our 'reporter' quickly interviewed a retired Military asstrophysicist Yakanot Trikame, who was quick to confirm our initial suspicions. Trikame said that he too witnessed the reported fireball and was able to predict its mass, chemical makeup and trajectory. He also issued a dire warning for mankind. According to Trikame, this fireball is larger than anything we humans are capable, as far as we 'know', of producing, and is totally unprecedented. While this fireball 'could' have been launched by humans there is no evidence, as yet, who that may have been. Trikame says that the mass of this object is approximately 330,000 times the mass of Our Earth and has a temperature of approximately 6,000 degrees C. He says that there is no doubt that this object is just one huge Nuclear explosion whose radiation rays reach our Earth in as little as Eight minutes. He recommends that people do Not stare into the explosion as it can cause temporary, and even permanent blindness. He said that right now this mysterious fireball is far enough away from Earth that we will not immediately be burnt to a crisp but that eventually it will consume us all. Trikame suggests that we wear clothing to cover our skin when outdoors, otherwise we risk radiation burns which could lead to formation of cancer cells later on. Already, reports are flowing into our 'newsroom' where temperatures on planet Earth are skyrocketing into the triple digits, lakes and rivers are evaporating, highways buckling, winter temperatures in the north eastern United States are at springtime levels, and this is the first time in one thousand years that measurable snow by now has not fallen in the Great Lakes region. Trikame hinted to our 'reporter' that humans should find ways to cope with this phenomenon, as we are in it for the long run, and that this fireball is Not our BFF.
Wait!!!! Hold the Press!! This just in!
Oh, never Mind, it's was just the Sun rising over the horizon. Never mind, carry on, go to breakfast, have some java..sorry about that...this is 'news station BBSN (buddy blacks satirical news) saying Opppss!
MASSIVE FIREBALL IN EASTERN SKY!
Just in from our 'News' Station BBSN;
Today, at approximately 7:05 am EST, a Huge FIREBALL was reported in the south eastern sky by startled residents of Atlantic City, New Jersey. All along the eastern seaboard 911 switchboards were inundated by frantic, and terrified callers! All traffic and commerce came to a standstill, airports quickly grounded all but emergency flights into and out of those facilities. The Military is on full alert! Our President has his mitts on the 'Red' phone! Our 'reporter' quickly interviewed a retired Military asstrophysicist Yakanot Trikame, who was quick to confirm our initial suspicions. Trikame said that he too witnessed the reported fireball and was able to predict its mass, chemical makeup and trajectory. He also issued a dire warning for mankind. According to Trikame, this fireball is larger than anything we humans are capable, as far as we 'know', of producing, and is totally unprecedented. While this fireball 'could' have been launched by humans there is no evidence, as yet, who that may have been. Trikame says that the mass of this object is approximately 330,000 times the mass of Our Earth and has a temperature of approximately 6,000 degrees C. He says that there is no doubt that this object is just one huge Nuclear explosion whose radiation rays reach our Earth in as little as Eight minutes. He recommends that people do Not stare into the explosion as it can cause temporary, and even permanent blindness. He said that right now this mysterious fireball is far enough away from Earth that we will not immediately be burnt to a crisp but that eventually it will consume us all. Trikame suggests that we wear clothing to cover our skin when outdoors, otherwise we risk radiation burns which could lead to formation of cancer cells later on. Already, reports are flowing into our 'newsroom' where temperatures on planet Earth are skyrocketing into the triple digits, lakes and rivers are evaporating, highways buckling, winter temperatures in the north eastern United States are at springtime levels, and this is the first time in one thousand years that measurable snow by now has not fallen in the Great Lakes region. Trikame hinted to our 'reporter' that humans should find ways to cope with this phenomenon, as we are in it for the long run, and that this fireball is Not our BFF.
Wait!!!! Hold the Press!! This just in!
Oh, never Mind, it's was just the Sun rising over the horizon. Never mind, carry on, go to breakfast, have some java..sorry about that...this is 'news station BBSN (buddy blacks satirical news) saying Opppss!
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