Leave Our Sun Alone

'Whew!! That was a close one folks! They almost catched us with our nearly empty heads stuck right up our butts! How dare that thar solar energy company try and pull a fast one over on we very learned leaders of our progressive little town. Well shucks, we showed Them who's smartest, that's for doggone sure. Can you Imagine them wantin' to plant a big ol' farm of bunches, and bunches of them solar thangs all over our pretty little town? And them tellin' us it'd make Electricity of all things! Well gosh darn it all, we showed'em who's got the 'brains' around these here parts! Tryin' to Steal our Sunshine indeed! Why, if'in they'd been able to do that little trick everyone of our trees would just drop over dead'er than a door nail. We wouldn't have narry a grass for our cows and stuff, and it'd be darker'n the bottom of a well all the time around here. What in this ever livin', lovin' world was they thinkin'!? I bet they just thought just 'cause we're a little bitty hick town, heck there's only about 900 of us hereabouts, that we'd be a pushover, and not even have the first clue what they was about. But we stood toe to toe with'em and made them skidaddle right on out of here. The thing we liked most about'em was seein'em hightail it back north where they came from. Now, our town and all our, as you can plainly see, foreward thinkin', town council members, and All of our happy, and satisfied residents can rest easy, and sip some sweet tea, and enjoy the sunshine that we saved from extinction. Now, we hear tell that some foolish outfit from up north a ways, is plannin' to come here and try and sell us some new fangled thing called a 'sewer system', or somethin' like that where all the houses are hooked up to one big poop pipe in the ground, and who Knows where it goes after That! But don't worry folks, we ain't gonna let Nobody take your backyard outhouses away from you! Your poop is safe with Us! Your town council members have everything under control. The Sun still Shines, and All is 'well' in Woodland, North Carolina ya'll!' :/ :/  ;)

North Carolina citizenry defeat pernicious Big Solar plan to suck up the Sun

Town council votes to deny zoning permit that would allow solar farm development.

by Eric Berger - Dec 13, 2015 7:00pm EST

 

We looked for solar panel farms in Woodland, N.C., but didn't find any.

Google Maps

The citizens of Woodland, N.C. have spoken loud and clear: They don't want none of them highfalutin solar panels in their good town. They scare off the kids. "All the young people are going to move out," warned Bobby Mann, a local resident concerned about the future of his burg. Worse, Mann said, the solar panels would suck up all the energy from the Sun.
Another resident—a retired science teacher, no less—expressed concern that a proposed solar farm would block photosynthesis, and prevent nearby plants from growing. Jane Mann then went on to add that there seemed to have been a lot of cancer deaths in the area, and that no one could tell her solar panels didn't cause cancer. “I want information," Mann said. "Enough is enough."
These comments were reported not in The Onion, but rather by the Roanoke-Chowan News-Herald. They came during a Woodland Town Council meeting in which Strata Solar Company sought to rezone an area northeast of the town, off of US Highway 258, to build a solar farm. The council not only rejected the proposal, it went a step further, voting for a complete moratorium on solar farms.
That seemed to please the residents evidently tired of Big Solar's relentless intrusion into their community. One resident, Mary Hobbs, said her home was surrounded by solar farms and has lost its value. That led Ars to the satellite view of Woodland on Google Maps, to see if we could verify the veracity of Hobbs' claims. This publication will not look the other way as Big Solar attempts to railroad the good citizens of small-town America. Alas, when we looked at the satellite view we didn't see any sign of solar farms as we perused the verdant fields and woods of the aptly named Woodland.