'NEWSFLASH,NEWSFLASH'! ANOTHER EXCITING 'NEWSFLASH"
Brought Straight to you from our 'News' Station 'BBSN' (BuddyBlacksSatiricalNews).
As you know by now, the infamous, barely invisable kkk (no need to Capiltalize a thing such as This) has litterly Littered the lawns of a few residents of Mobile, Alabama, USA, with so called 'recruitment' flyers tucked within those snappy ziplock sandwich baggies. What a clever way to utilize those handy baggies. Our brave of heart, and ever eager 'Reporter' BuddyBlack sniffed the air and sensed a 'news' coupe, and off he galloped to corner the 'leader' of the klan in the sorbid form of none other than grand wizard Frank Ancona . Lets tune in our newsy ears while BuddyBlack (BB) dwelves into the phobic mind of that grand wizard (GW) of that not so nearly invisible social club, kkk. Shhhh..lets listen in now...
BB: Thanks a whole bunch for agreeing to this one on one interview GW. I really like your Toga Sheet outfit!
GW: It ain't a 'toga', it's my 'uniform'!
BB: Now I understand that your little club espouses All American values, and that you are totally against people and products from countries outside the United States. What exactly Is your stand in regards to that?
GW: Weun's is one hundred percent White Americans an we all stand for American made stuff and all that. This here is America and we don't cotton to no foreigners. We all like to think of us as an All White, All American Club.
BB: I hear what you're saying GW. And while we're on the subject of 'cotton', I notice that the 'Product label' on your 'uniform' as you call it, indicates that the Sheet you made your 'uniform' out of, was manufactured in China. How do you reconcile 'saying' One thing, yet 'doing' the opposite?
GW: (kicking a dirt ball, scratching his head, figgiting, no response)
BB: Are all your 'club' members pure blooded Caucasions?
GW: Absolutly! They ain't no mixed blood people allowed!
BB: Well, I guess that would apply to You,Yourself?
GW: Absolutly!
BB: Welllll, how do you insure that All your 'club' members do Not have, say..Hispanic, or perhaps Italion, or God forbid, African blood mixed in there gushing with their 'All White' blood cells?
GW: Oh, we have our Ways to make sure of That. There's forms they gotta fill out, and we can just Look at'em and believe you me, we'll know pretty quick.
BB: Yeah...so you can tell just by looking and I'm Sure that your 'prospects' Always tell the Truth. How about a DNA test? Ever do one of Those to weed out the mixedblooders? Ever done a DNA on Yourself for instance?
GW: (doing the foot shuffle, picking an imaginary booger, looking right and left, exhibiting the fight or flight syndrome, avoiding eye contact)
BB: Has the kkk, in Any form, at Any time in its past been responsible for doing violience against a Non White person?
GW: Oh shucks, I can Answer That one. No, Never! We don't condone no meaness agin nobody. We are just as peaceful, and friendly as a junkyard dog. If'n we hear of one of our 'club' members even thankin' 'bout hurtin' somebody, we take their card away an send'em home.
BB: I read that you believe in the Bible and are a faithful Christian. Do you believe that the sign of the Cross is a sacred symble?
GW: Oh good Lord Yes! We would defend that Cross of Christ to the death!
BB: Well, explain to us why you Burn that very Cross during your little 'club' Rally's, and in the Yards of the homes of Black Families. I mean, after all, what would Jesus do?
GW: (pretending to answer his cell phone, pretending to talk with someone)
BB: Why are your Hoods pointy at the top, and why wear Sheets, that by the way, are made in China, and which you insist on calling your 'uniform'?
GW: This here is 'Southern Pride' son, a tradition handed down from father to son since way back yonder 'fore we was even borned. We carry on the White Pride that we fought for during the war of the northern invasion of the south. They wanted to take our 'property rights' away from us and we wont gonna let'em.
BB: You Do realize that the Civil War ended in 1865 with the Southern Secessionist States finally Surrendering, thus ending Slavery, or as you call it your 'property rights'?
GW: As long as there's a full blooded white man in the South, that war, as you call it, will Never be done son.
BB: So if I understand it correctly, your 'club' does not like, in fact Hates, Blacks, Jews, Italion, Hispanics, Gays, Indians, and well, everyone that's Not like yourselves. Fair statement?
GW: You hit the nail on the head boy!
BB: So, you pretty much know about Everyone in your 'club'. Do you have any Gays?
GW: Nary a one! That'd be one Dead Man!
BB: How do you 'test' a person for 'gayness'?
GW: We hate them peoples, we can tell one right off.
BB: Are you homophobic?
GW: Now I ain't called You no nasty names boy, don't you be calling me one of Them! I ain't Never been with no man, not even crossed my mind that I know of, and I Think I'd be knowin'!
BB: When was your 'club' actually founded?
GW: Well, it was way over a hundred years ago. A long time ago.
BB: Does 1865 ring a bell with you, just in case someone else asks you?
GW: That's probably about right.
BB: Your 'club' members littered lawns during the night here in Mobile. Why didn't you do it during the Daylight hours instead of in the dead of darkness?
GW: It's just safer that way, less traffic on the streets.
BB: Do you consider yourself to be a Paronoid person?
GW: A pair of What??
BB: What Other Phobia's do you have that you'd like to admit to?
GW: They ain't nothin' wrong with me, I'm healthy as can be. Boy, I'm tired of bein' called vile names! I gotta go now, gotta throw my 'uniform' in the wash, smellin' kinda sweaty here!
And so ends Another dumpester dive by our intrepid 'reporter' BuddyBlack, into the possibly vague and paronoid mind of one who murks around in the halflife of neither here nor there. Join us again when BB dares to tread where others even fear to 'Think.' :/ ;);)
The KKK Sends Recruitment Flyers That Read 'We Also Have a Dream'
By Katrina Manning on
Over the weekend, flyers were found tucked in sandwich bags and left on lawns in Mobile, Alabama's midtown area. The flyers read "WE ALSO HAVE A DREAM," as they wished Dr. Martin Luther King Jr a happy birthday.
The flyers also read "The blacks have NAACP, the Mexicans have La Raza, the Jews have JDL, and white people have the KKK."
It came with an illustration of a Klansman wearing a hooded robe and the phrase "The KKK Wants You!"
Resident Tricia Butts told WPMI, "Luckily I didn't get one on my door. I think a neighbor must have come by and grabbed it before we could see it, but I'm kind of shocked to see something like that on our street."
Photo: Blogs Tallahassee
The flyers also read "The blacks have NAACP, the Mexicans have La Raza, the Jews have JDL, and white people have the KKK."
It came with an illustration of a Klansman wearing a hooded robe and the phrase "The KKK Wants You!"
Resident Tricia Butts told WPMI, "Luckily I didn't get one on my door. I think a neighbor must have come by and grabbed it before we could see it, but I'm kind of shocked to see something like that on our street."
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