'NEWS' 'NEWS' Another Breaking 'NEWS' Alert!
This breaking 'News' alert comes to you from our breathtaking 'News' Station BBSN (BuddyBlacksSatiricalNews) as 'reported' by BuddyBlack (BB).
Well folks, it appears that our Intrepid roaming 'Reporter' BuddyBlack (BB) has once again scooped the 'news' that's barely fit to Print, and barely fit to Read. He has bravely gone afield in search of newsy things that we would all like to aquaint ourselves of. In this instant case BB somehow managed, what some have long thought impossible, to corner in a Roundhouse, a U.S. Supreme Court Justice in the form of Justice Scalia (JS), and nit-pick his 'supreme' intellect on a few matters that 'should' matter to all of us less informed souls. I see that they are comfortably nestled in their Snuggles around the fireplace sipping hot totties, so lets tune our ears, and listen in as Justice Scalia explains life as He knows it.
BB: Thank you Justice Scalia for sipping Totties with me. I know I 'promised' that I would not ask you a bunch of questions but if you don't mind I'd like to ask just a few while we warm our toes on this chilly winters eve.
JS: Hmmm.. looks like I'm a captive audience seeing as how my Snuggle zipper 'mysteriously' Broke after I zipped it up.
BB: There are Some who think there should be 'Term Limits' of Supreme Court Justices. How do You feel about That?
JS: Ha! Fat chance! This is the best gig I've ever had. I'll be here until I'm too old to think soundly.
BB: There are 'some' who think that you may have already reached that goal. What do you say to those people?
JS: A bunch of jealous Un Americans! Our Founding fathers made the rule that we can have this gig as long as we have 'good' behavior. I'm in it for the long haul.
BB: I suppose the term 'good behavior' could be interpreted in many ways.
JS: I'm not Going Anywhere, so Forget it!
BB: It's been 'reported' that you said that you have never read our Constitution. Is that correct?
JS: What are you getting At? I don't Need to 'read' the Constitution, my job is to defend it and make sure that no one messes with it.
BB: It has also been 'reported' that you said, in fact in front of a High School assembly, that our Government should promote religion over non religion. Is That correct?
JS: Our country was built around religion by religious people. We have drifted away from that premise. I think it's up to our Government to bring religion Back into our Government.
BB: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof…”, does That little paragraph ring any bells for you? Have you ever heard the phrase, 'Seperation of State and Church'?
JS: Where'd That come from? Are you making stuff up as we go along here?
BB: Well, Actually sir, it's from Our, the United States Of America's, very own Constitution. It means that 'Congress', our Government, shall make NO LAWS respecting ESTABLISHMENT, that's like our Government cannot 'Proselytize' any form of 'religion', of RELIGION. Is there Any part of That, that confuses you?
JS: Well obviously That's not what they had in mind.
BB: But if they 'had' something Else in mind don't you think they would have written That instead of what they Did write?
JS: Look, it's getting Hot in this stupid Snuggle, and my Tottie is getting cold!
BB: Do you 'think' that perhaps you have stepped out of your 'judicial robe', and gone above and beyond what your role as a Supreme Court Justice calls for? If you feel so strongly about 'religion', how do you talk yourself into be Unbiased when a case Involving 'religion' comes before your court?
JS: Right Now I just want to step out of this Snuggle!!
BB: Do you not think that perhaps instead of 'Defending' our Constitution, which you have never actually Read, that you are now ignoring some of its premise by inserting your Own personal beliefs instead? Do you not see a 'conflict' of interest here?
JS: The Only 'conflict' I see right now is that I can't get out of this thing! Somebody hellllp meeee! Look, help me out of this Snuggle and I promise I will 'rule' on your questions..in...about ten years.
BB: Oh, I think you've Already 'answered' our questions. Thanks again for being here. Tottie Up!
And so ends another telling adventure, This one, into the conflicted mind of one of our Supreme Court Justices. Tune in again for another exciting dive into the depths of the unknown, here at BBSN! ;) ;)
No comments:
Post a Comment