'Yeah, yeah, biased people, Demoncrats and 'Fake News' publishers alike, are gonna say stuff like, 'WTF' am I thinking? Actually, I have the best memory, even more than my little minion, 'Useless' Pence, and I just don't recall telling anyone to start that silly, go no where, ridiculous investigation in the first place. I mean, 'what' voter fraud? After all, I am the one that was 'elected', right? Right?? My numbers were counted n the ultra millions, remember? Well, I sure do! What a memory I have! Incredible turnouts! So obviously there was no voter fraud going on at the time. Now that's not to say that when my re-election comes around that there won't be massive voter fraud going on all across America. Millions of Canadians, Chinese, Russians, and Labrodoreians will be imported to vote against me. Huge numbers! Millions and millions! But as usual, along with my untold billions of bit coins dollars and my ever forgiving base of tunnel visioned supporters, I have no doubt that I will once again come out smelling like a certain desert flower that blooms once every thousand years. But, when this secret investigation was brought to my attention, I immediately acted 'Presidential', and put my little thumb down to mash it like the stink bug it had become. And now, like the good, and benevolent dictat..errr.. leader that is, that I am infamous for, I decree that from now on, only I alone, with 'proof' positive 'evidence' of course, can start an investigation of wrongdoing in America, excluding the White House, and extended family and friends, and wealthy donors, and influential republicans naturally, and that I will be the top investigator of that 'investigation', whatever that may entail, which of course only I would be privy to. So, you 'fake News' spreaders, you can stop the presses and get off my aching back so that I can get back to my golf game. Crybabies!' 
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