'NEWS' ALERT! Breaking News, Breaking news!
This ' Breaking News Alert brought to you by your trusted 'news' source, 'BBSN' (BuddyBlacksSatiricalNews station).
It has been reported by our indifatigable, johnny on the spot, 'News' reporter, BuddyBlack, of an incrediblely, unbelievable, robbery which has just occurred at the 'World Bank' in Somewhereville, USA!
We take you now to the actual scene of the 'crime of the times', while this hard to believe robbery is still smoking hot.
'Buddy, what can you tell us about this horrific incident?'
Buddy; Well, I'm glad you ask Bob. If I hadn't seen this with my own corrected vision eyes, I would never have believed something like this could even happen Bob!
There I was, standing in line in the 'World Bank' right here in in the little nowhere burg of 'Somewhereville'. I was simply minding my own simple minded business, hoping I had enough money in my account for lunch down at 'CheapO's Cafe'. Bob, they have the best Vegi Burgers and fries you will have ever tasted! Boy, was I hungry! But like I said Bob, I was minding my own business, not bothering a soul, just checking out the cracks in the ceiling, waiting for my turn at the teller window. I usually use the drive thru but some guy was changing his tire there. Who does that!?
All of a sudden like, I hear this loud whirring sound behind me, the lights flickered off and on, cellphones started binking, and at that moment I noticed that my shoe was untied. Just as I bent over to re-tie it, out of the corner of my good eye, I see this huge, hulking, hulk of a robot-like thing come crashing through the lobby door. What an incredible sight Bob! This thing had a human-like figure but no facial feature to be seen! Little lights were blinking where it's eyes should have been! Clomp, clomp, clomp, went it's little metalic feet as it came across the lobby floor waving it's mechanical-like arms! Bob, it was a friggin' machine that was actually walking upright, up-right I tell you, and I recognized it right away as some sort of unsupervised, on the lam, Robot! In a shrill robot-like voice it was yelling for the Tellers to give it all their Harddrives, computor chips, memory cards, calculators, and looking around the lobby it yelled for everyone to give up their cell phones, hearing aids and heart monitors! I tried to run but I was standing on my un-tied shoelace, and couldn't remember which foot to raise so that I could make my escape! I wasn't about to give up my way overpriced cell phone so I put it where the sun don't shine! That Robot gobbled up every piece of electronic equipment that was tossed to it! My phone was binking off and on to no end, and was driving me bat butt crazy! And then, it looked around with those blinking eyes and said, 'Hey thanks a lot, I needed that'. And then like nobodys business it was outta there. I was able to snap one good pic of it as it lumbered, actually ran, away.
Something like this was bound to happen sooner or later Bob. Makes you wonder what in the world was this thing 'thinking'. And why so hungry? Is it homeless? Does it have a 'family' somewhere? Is this simply a case of a 'Robot gone haywire', or is this the beginning of 'The Robots that ate 'Somewhereville', and where will it strike next?
Well, Bob, I had six bucks in my account, so I'm headed for 'CheapO's', unless that rogue robot gets there first. Those young 'check-out' cashiers can't figure out how to give change with-out their electronic cash registers!
This was really exciting Bob, ya can't make this kind of stuff up if ya tried!
This is your ever ready, dependable 'news' guy, BuddyBlack, signing over, and out.
Be sure to tune in sometime in the unforseen future when we'll bring you more exciting, unbelievable 'news', probably as it happens.
This ' Breaking News Alert brought to you by your trusted 'news' source, 'BBSN' (BuddyBlacksSatiricalNews station).
It has been reported by our indifatigable, johnny on the spot, 'News' reporter, BuddyBlack, of an incrediblely, unbelievable, robbery which has just occurred at the 'World Bank' in Somewhereville, USA!
We take you now to the actual scene of the 'crime of the times', while this hard to believe robbery is still smoking hot.
'Buddy, what can you tell us about this horrific incident?'
Buddy; Well, I'm glad you ask Bob. If I hadn't seen this with my own corrected vision eyes, I would never have believed something like this could even happen Bob!
There I was, standing in line in the 'World Bank' right here in in the little nowhere burg of 'Somewhereville'. I was simply minding my own simple minded business, hoping I had enough money in my account for lunch down at 'CheapO's Cafe'. Bob, they have the best Vegi Burgers and fries you will have ever tasted! Boy, was I hungry! But like I said Bob, I was minding my own business, not bothering a soul, just checking out the cracks in the ceiling, waiting for my turn at the teller window. I usually use the drive thru but some guy was changing his tire there. Who does that!?
All of a sudden like, I hear this loud whirring sound behind me, the lights flickered off and on, cellphones started binking, and at that moment I noticed that my shoe was untied. Just as I bent over to re-tie it, out of the corner of my good eye, I see this huge, hulking, hulk of a robot-like thing come crashing through the lobby door. What an incredible sight Bob! This thing had a human-like figure but no facial feature to be seen! Little lights were blinking where it's eyes should have been! Clomp, clomp, clomp, went it's little metalic feet as it came across the lobby floor waving it's mechanical-like arms! Bob, it was a friggin' machine that was actually walking upright, up-right I tell you, and I recognized it right away as some sort of unsupervised, on the lam, Robot! In a shrill robot-like voice it was yelling for the Tellers to give it all their Harddrives, computor chips, memory cards, calculators, and looking around the lobby it yelled for everyone to give up their cell phones, hearing aids and heart monitors! I tried to run but I was standing on my un-tied shoelace, and couldn't remember which foot to raise so that I could make my escape! I wasn't about to give up my way overpriced cell phone so I put it where the sun don't shine! That Robot gobbled up every piece of electronic equipment that was tossed to it! My phone was binking off and on to no end, and was driving me bat butt crazy! And then, it looked around with those blinking eyes and said, 'Hey thanks a lot, I needed that'. And then like nobodys business it was outta there. I was able to snap one good pic of it as it lumbered, actually ran, away.
Something like this was bound to happen sooner or later Bob. Makes you wonder what in the world was this thing 'thinking'. And why so hungry? Is it homeless? Does it have a 'family' somewhere? Is this simply a case of a 'Robot gone haywire', or is this the beginning of 'The Robots that ate 'Somewhereville', and where will it strike next?
Well, Bob, I had six bucks in my account, so I'm headed for 'CheapO's', unless that rogue robot gets there first. Those young 'check-out' cashiers can't figure out how to give change with-out their electronic cash registers!
This was really exciting Bob, ya can't make this kind of stuff up if ya tried!
This is your ever ready, dependable 'news' guy, BuddyBlack, signing over, and out.
Be sure to tune in sometime in the unforseen future when we'll bring you more exciting, unbelievable 'news', probably as it happens.
huffingtonpost.com|By Andy McDonald
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