'Ask Buddy', Installment Number 19

'Ask Buddy' Installment Number 19

 

 

Dear Buddy,

I am confident that you can help me with a very vexing issue.
 Here, I'll start at the beginning. My 21 month old Border Collie, 'Bella' has for some reason known only to her, has arbitrarily decided that she wants to sleep downstairs now instead of in her crate upstairs where she has slept every night since she was 9 weeks old. I mean, what's with that?? Our other BC, 'Buddyboy' 14 years old, also slept upstairs until 'he' decided that the stairs were not worth tackling anymore, and so he now sleeps downstairs. I feel abandoned and un-needed now but I refuse to sleep downstairs just because they have decided to. Did I mention that I just spent a small fortune for a brand new soft sided crate for her? Grrr!

What should I do now Buddy? I've tried talking to her about this but to no avail.

'Feeling flustered in the Alleghanies'

 

Dear 'Flustered'

Relax, take a deep breathe, life is short, otherwise you'll just die tired, and thank your lucky stars you have only 'two' Border Collies!

Few realize it but when it comes to BC's, there's a particular method to their madness, and the sooner you are in touch with that fact, the sooner you will find the inner peace you seek.

'Bella' has simply decided that this phase of 'your' training has successfully been completed, and it is time for you to gradually move into 'your' new training regimen. You see, she has, since she was 9 weeks old, allowed 'you' to imagine that 'you' were training 'her', when all along 'she' was training 'you' to let 'her' do what 'she' wanted to do all along. And now that she is 'older' and more independent, she has decided that enough, is enough of this time consuming coddling of you in your continuing infancy, and time for 'you' to learn 'new tricks'. You must quickly get over this moment and move on with life as she dictates. You don't want to step on a 'doggie mine' in the middle of the night do you? Do you?? Of course not! Simply go along with her decision as if it were your own. Humor her, praise her for her great decision making skills, ask her to teach you a new board game such as checkers or chess, and give her lots of those, 'good girl, good girl' praises that she looks for. It's ok for you to 'pretend' that 'you' are in charge, she expects that, but always know that you are just along for the ride, 'she' is the 'driver' and you, simply a willing passenger.

Relax, and enjoy the 'ride'. Peace!  ;)  ;)

'Ask Buddy', Installment Number 18

'Ask Buddy', Installment Number 18

Dear Buddy,
I've been reading your so-called 'Advice Column ' hoping that some day I'd read something that would enlighten my otherwise drab world. But, so far, not much. Which makes me wonder....do you have to have a college degree to be a 'self helper' or whatever? I thought about doing it myself, but like you, would anyone believe anything I say? Would it be fair to assume that you make up a lot of the so called requests for 'advice'? I read the one where the woman who took your 'advice' is now on the run from the law, could that happen to 'me'? Are you 'for real'? I think one of us is nutty as a Christmas fruit cake, is it you or is it just me?
'Skeptical in Canton'

Dear Skeptical,
'Yes'

'Ask Buddy', Installment Number 17

'Ask Buddy', Installment Number 17

Hi Buddy!
Remember when I wrote to you asking for advice? I'm the woman whose husband I 'thought' was running around with wild women, and just like a man, was constantly denying it. Of course it later turned out that he actually wasn't. But in the meantime I told you what I suspected, and you told me to "clean out the checking account and book a 'singles' cruise". Well, I did what you 'advised' me to do. And now I'm 'wanted' in three states for forgery, bank fraud, theft, and income tax evasion. What the hell buddy! I'm living under an assumed name which I can't even spell, dyed my hair, the color of which I hate, I'm living under a rock practically, and all because I listed to your stupid advice!
What should I do now?? What Buddy, what!?
'Wanted in Three States'

Dear 'Wanted',
Stop following my 'advice'?

'Ask Buddy', Installment Number 16

'Ask Buddy', Installment Number 16

Dear Buddy,
It takes a lot to stump me but as luck would have it there's a few things that do. The other day A few friends were talking about snakes, and one mentioned that people actually 'milk' snakes for their venom. WTH is 'that' all about Buddy!? I mean, I don't claim to be a damn snake expert, but, do snakes really have titties??? Where do they even keep them?? Wouldn't it be like slithering around on a bunch of speedbumps? Wouldn't their 'milk' be poison in the first place? Is this just 'udderly' crazy, or is it just me!?
'Stumped' in Reno

Dear 'Stumped',
Yes, "udderly", and yes, 'you'.

"Immunity Passports". Really!??

"Immunity Passports". Really?? This is akin to giving a 'hall pass' to a 'serial killer' just because he hasn't killed anyone since 'yesterday'!
This "Immunity Passport" idea is about as dumb as anything can possibly be, it simply proves that there may be a cure someday for this killer virus, but there will never be a 'cure' for stupidity. We cannot 'ignore' the Covid-19 pandemic away, and a "passport" will not make American's safe in any form or fashion! :/

Could Covid-19 antibody testing have the unintended consequence of creating an antibody elite?

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bbc.com

Could 'immunity passports' create an antibody elite?

Could Covid-19 antibody testing have the unintended consequence of…

Could Covid-19 antibody testing have the unintended

Hannity, trumps 'Middle Finger Puppet'

Hannity is simply a 'Middle Finger Hand Puppet' of trump, 'The Manipulator', and he knows that by saying, "Let me get this straight," "He’s constantly being tested for cognitive abilities? Why is Joe Biden getting constantly tested for a cognitive decline? After hearing that, I’m wondering if maybe all Americans need cognitive testing regularly. That concerns me," "Does that concern the American people? Are they going to ask the ever-forgetful, weak Joe Biden why he’s being constantly tested for cognitive decline?", and, if he spurts it often enough, his and trumps followers will start saying and believing it as well. Nothing like programming your cult followers to mimic everything you say.
"He’s constantly being tested for cognitive abilities?" Perhaps Biden meant he is constantly being 'tested' by people like Hannity and trump.
No matter what, it's a given that if there's a conspiracy theory to be spread, trump and Hannity are the 'go to' minions to get it done. :/


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Sean Hannity opened Tuesday's edition of "Hannity" by panning Joe Biden's first press conference in three months, during which the former vice president defended his cognitive ability and said he “can hardly wait” to compare it to President Trump's as the general election campaign heats up.

About this website

foxnews.com

Sean Hannity asks: 'Why is Joe Biden getting constantly tested for a cognitive decline? ... That concerns me'

Sean Hannity opened Tuesday's edition of "Hannity" by panning Joe Biden's first press conference in three months, during which the former vice president defended his cognitive ability and said he “can hardly wait” to compare it to President Trump's as the general election campaign heats up.

Sean Hannity opened Tuesday's edition of "Hannity" by panning